The real truth about holiday miscarriage grief!
Experiencing a miscarriage is hard enough!
Experiencing a miscarriage during the holidays is just plain unfair.
Consequently, miscarriage grief will be your biggest challenge during the holidays!
However, after having four miscarriages during different holiday seasons these 4 ways helped me to navigate my miscarriage grief.
I am not a doctor. The information given is purely meant to inform not treat. Please consult your doctor for your personal medical care.
4 ways to survive the holidays when you are heavy with miscarriage grief.
1. Address your physical needs
Firstly, do NOT attend a party/celebration during your first week of miscarriage recovery, you are physically “sick”.
Secondly, do BE SELFISH. The first week of recovery is all about you.
***Feel in control during a time of such uncertainty. The FREE miscarriage recovery supply checklist covers your basic first week needs.
That being said, if you choose to go out during the first week of miscarriage recovery bring a change of clothes, pads, liners, wipes, small garbage bags, painkillers, tissues, and make-up! You will be more emotional than normal.
Related topic: Miscarriage D&C Recovery! Be prepared for the week AFTER surgery.
2. Understand your current emotional state
Holiday parties are a time to celebrate. That can be hard when you feel broken inside.
Am I ready to talk about my miscarriage or not?
Keep to yourself: Only you will know what’s going on and can privately process it until you are ready to share.
OR
Tell others you miscarried: Sharing your miscarriage right away allows you start talking about it and potentially find support from others.
Related topic: Miscarriage Grief: Navigating the Journey of Healing
*Decide BEFORE you attend the party/celebration if you would like to share your miscarriage. Then communicate that to anyone else who already knows.
What to expect from people at the party/celebrations?
In reality not everyone understands how it feels to miscarry! There is a good chance someone will, unknowingly, say something that hurts you.
In the event they do say something hurtful, remember you are grieving and they generally mean well.
>>> Exert from FREE Miscarriage Recovery – Processing pdf. Learn more
You CAN step out for a breather.
Whenever your grief starts to creep in excuse yourself. Step out side, go for a walk, go to the bathroom or a bedroom, sit in your car, etc.
With this purpose in mind try the 15 minute excuse explained below. Your grief wants to be heard too.
3. Honor your holiday miscarriage
Give your grief a place to go.
For instance you can honor your holiday miscarriage grief in more than one way, big or small, and as much as you want.
Ways to honor…
- Frame a ultrasound if you have one
- Special Miscarriage Artwork
- Journal a letter to them
- Choose a special symbolic object/song
- Hold your empty belly and sing a lullaby
- Have a small ceremony
- Designate a special place of remembrance
- Additional Ideas in Free Miscarriage Recovery-Processing pdf
Related topic: What gift to give Her OR YOURSELF during the struggle of a miscarriage?
4. Take steps to process your miscarriage grief
First thing to remember, facing the gut retching reality of your miscarriage is painful. Your grief is real, raw, and wants to be heard.
So, for this reason, how do you process miscarriage grief?
>>> Access this FREE download that will walk you through simple, repeatable, practices I personally used during my 5 miscarriage recoveries.
Action Step: Grab your journal or some paper, find a quiet spot, ask yourself the following questions, then write whatever comes to mind. (Free printable here)
- Why did I miscarry?
- What am I most sad about?
- What should I say when talking to other people?
- How can I honor my miscarriage?
Furthermore, repeat the action step above daily as needed. Your grief needs a voice.
Related Topic: Resource that includes The 7 Stages of Grief & their correlation with miscarriage.
Final Thoughts
In short holiday miscarriage grief is the worst! The grief accompanied by this loss is in-measurable.
Having endured two holiday seasons after a miscarriage I can promise you these 4 ways listed above will make a difference.
Your miscarriage did happen.
Undeniably, you will be hurting.
It is my prayer you will find the peace you seek during this holiday season.
Related Topic: Want a safe place to talk about your miscarriage? Learn about a One-On-One with Me, Chantell
Most important, remember you are AMAZING. Your body is Amazing. You got this…
One.Day.At.A.Time.
Hello Friend! I’m Chantell…
Wife, Mother of 5 earthly & 6 heavenly babies, and love God. I blog about Motherhood. Read More
Current Mother Counsel: The best quote that got you through hard times? >>>Weigh in here
